Fatten up, Rose Bud

I sit here in a dark hospital room with only the hallway light flooding in on the face of my child. Little Rose Bud had not been putting on weight and should be back to her birth weight by now but isn't. She was 8.11 at birth and has stayed at 8.4 for about a week and gained 2 ounces to out her to 8.6. We went to the pediatrician for another weight check yesterday. He sent us home with some crazy SNS (fancy for catheter and syringe craziness) contraption which I could not figure out once we got home. Nor could I awaken my little lady to eat. I was beginning to feel helpless - ok lets be honest, I have been feeling helpless - in the fight to put more weight on her. I noticed how lethargic she was and that her little legs were china doll white so I called the ped back and we went back to visit. She chokes and gags when she eats, she projectile vomits most times when she takes a bottle, she falls asleep when she nurses, and for the most part, eating for her is not a pleasurable experience. Initially our ped wanted us to get in with the lactation consultant and then the more he worked with her and then saw her projectile everything up, he had us head to the hospital. She went almost 10 hours without eating yesterday and was only 8.3 after our long day. I don't think there is anything worse than knowing what will make your child stop crying and no longer be miserable and not be able I give it to her. Finally she got to eat and killed it! Yay. We have gotten all good results from most of the tests so far and still waiting on some more, and they tell us she will not be going home until we have at least 2 days of weight gain. I certainly don't want anything to be wrong with her, but i do want them to find something that is causing her to not want to eat and not put on weight. So a few more days peeking at my kiddo with an iv and splint on and sleeping here at this hospital and a few more days missing my boy. Fortunately Mimi and Deda are showing my boy how to "paaaaaaar-taaaaaay!"

More to come.